She continues to be more reactive to questions and commands (as a friend reminded me, Moms in general don't have a great track record of "responding to commands" so we have tried to quickly move on to questions - it just doesn't feel right telling her what to do!). What started out a few weeks ago as a light hand squeeze or a slightly raised finger to respond has progressed to more deliberate movements that let us know she is in there and working hard to get her body to listen. Yesterday she clapped, tried to wink, brought her finger all the way up to a phone we were holding near her, and even tried to pucker up to kiss Dad (he loved that). I'm not sure exactly what I envisioned for Mom's progress early on in our journey, but I generally assumed it would be about Mom's brain trying to catch up with her physical capacities - perhaps this is because the we know the crux of her injury is in the Thalmus. Over the last couple of weeks, it has begun to feel like the opposite relationship between body and brain. She seems to be able to comprehend and process more than her body is letting her at this stage. Her muscles have been significantly weakened over the last two months so it is difficult to consistently complete all of the requests of her therapists even if her initial reaction or muscle movement is the right one (for example, she can't always pull her head all the way back up straight, but the initial muscle movement in the back of her neck indicates that she is making the appropriate response). At the end of the day, this is encouraging from my point of view. She will get stronger over time and more capable of responding, but the I find great comfort knowing that she IS in there. Given the nature of her injury this is truly a miracle. It has to be terribly frustrating for her - more than we can ever understand - to fight for every movement, to try and fail with things that have always been second nature. She is working so hard. We are all so proud of her and cherish every movement, every twitch, every purposeful gaze. We long desperately for continued progress and remain confident that it will continue to come - likely in a similar fashion to what we've seen over the last two months: slowly, but (most importantly) surely.
On my way into work this morning, I was listening to ESPN radio and they played Jim Valvano's speech from the first ESPY awards in 1993. I hadn't heard it for a long time and had forgotten how amazing it was. For those that don't know, Jim Valvano was a long time college basketball coach at schools like NC State and Iona. At the time he gave this speech he was just two months shy of losing a battle with cancer and had originally requested that someone accept the award on his behalf given how sick he was. His foundation, the Jimmy V Foundation, has raised millions of dollars for cancer research over the last 19 years. You don't have to be a sports fan to appreciate his message - it is not your dime-a-dozen ra-ra sports speech, but rather speaks to life, laughter, hope, and family from a guy that knew he didn't have much time left. There are great lessons in there about enjoying every moment, reprioritizing to focus on what really matters, and to NEVER, EVER GIVE UP!! I have pasted the link below in case you want to check it out.
Thanks you for all you do. We love you all more than you know. Have a great day!!
BL
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